Why Didn’t She Call?

  • Sharebar

You met a girl, you hit it off – maybe you even slept with her, and now she isn’t responding to your texts or calls. This post is going to be really short, because it’s really freakin simple: you’re too fucking eager. 

What you’re probably doing, and what you should be doing. 

Okay, so you’re out with your friends having a good time, and you finally muster up the courage to strike up a conversation with the girl that keeps smiling at you. You’re rocking it that night. You have the cool hair, the cool shoes, the cool shirt – you’re in the zone.

I have a friend that is no stranger to picking up girls in a bar. He’s the guy that just has no care in the world when it comes to talking to women. His downfall: the same courage he has to land em’, scares them right the fuck away. His first mistake: he’s talking way too soon and way too often. His second: he doesn’t know how to text. It sounds stupid, right? Yes, texting is HUGE. How you text, how often you text, how soon you respond and what you say are huge when it comes to women.

So the girl you met, she was totally into you, but she’s not responding to your texts/calls. If you’ve ever seen the movie Swingers, it’s a great movie, but Vince’s 3-day rule is total bullshit. If she dropped her guard down to give you her number, you damn well better use it. If you hit her up 3 days later she’s not even going to remember who you are. Chances are she’s probably busy, though. That’s the beauty of texting. We’re so accustomed to asynchronous conversation now because we don’t have to be tied to a phone. I hate talking on the phone, and most younger girls do, too. Sure, she wants to hear your voice at some point, but texting is so much easier, and if you’re slick enough you can even master some sarcasm and grab a laugh or two. Most guys get caught up in calling first thing the next day, or saying something stupid like, “You’re so pretty. I can’t wait to take you out sometime”. Save it. Pretty, fun girls are used to hearing how pretty they are. You’re much better off going with something witty and clever. Chances are she told you what she does when you first met, so make up something goofy about her job(if you’re texting her during the week, anyway).

Grammar and Spelling

I can’t tell you how much of a pet peeve of mine it is to deal with shitty spellers. If you don’t know English, learn it. If you don’t know the difference between to, two and too, learn it. If you’re not sure about how to spell something, look it up. Girls are smart(most of them, anyway). You can impress the hell out of a girl just with your spelling(as stupid as this sounds, I promise you it’s true). However, if you are butchering sentences with chopped up garble you are going to be forgotten about quicker than the guy that used a shitty line on her at the club. Don’t curse a lot, either(funny, right?). If you’re going to curse, make sure it has a place. Don’t use “fuck” every other word. The “f ” bomb is funny when you place it strategically, but if you go overboard you just sound like a hoosier.

Response Time

Girls like a guy that’s busy. If you are waiting patiently for this chick to respond only to respond immediately after, you look needy. First of all, she’s probably busy, and nobody wants to be tied to a conversation while they’re at work. Besides, if you’re playing your cards right and giving enough time, she’s probably anxiously awaiting your response. If you’re getting back at her the minute she sends a message, you’re giving it away too easy. Oh, another thing, too. Try to gauge what kind of responses you’re getting. If you’re getting nothing but one-word responses and she’s not engaging in conversation, she’s probably not into you. Don’t ask questions, don’t ask her if she’s busy or if she wants to talk later. Forget about her and move on.

Chances are, you call or text way too soon, way too often. Dating is a game of cat and mouse, unfortunately, and you have to learn how to play. If she give you her number, be sure to call or text her, but don’t be the guy that “won’t quit fucking calling me”.

-Tommy B